Our Mission

For many years, I was a man living in quiet desperation. I learned early on that vulnerability wasn’t safe, so I hid my emotions behind a façade of perfection. On the outside, everything looked fine, but inside, I was battling chaos.

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Henry David Thoreau said it best: “Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.” That was me. I searched for fulfillment in sports, bodybuilding, women, alcohol—even religion. But none of it filled the void.

 

The Years of Quiet Desperation

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A serious knee injury in college ended my dream of playing professional football in an instant, and with it, my identity as a football player was stripped away.

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I spent 18 years in a marriage that ultimately ended in divorce. The pain of that was real, and the path to healing, recovery, and forgiveness has been long.

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In my younger years, I tried drowning my pain in alcohol. I experienced countless blackouts in my teens and twenties, and in my thirties, I suffered alcohol poisoning. It was a wake-up call that drinking couldn’t solve my problems. I’m grateful for the second chances I’ve been given.

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My career, while financially rewarding, left me feeling unfulfilled. For 17 years, I made a six-figure income, but I was stuck in a life that felt hollow. The feelings of discontent, hopelessness, and dread weighed me down. I felt dead inside.

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As an INFJ (Myers-Briggs personality type) and a highly sensitive person (HSP), which is rare, I longed for understanding. But how could anyone understand me when I didn’t understand myself? I spent years trying to be someone I wasn’t.

 

Suffering in Silence

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During those years of quiet desperation, I suffered in silence. I had no one to turn to, no one to talk to. I felt isolated and depressed.

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One night, in desperation, I fell to my knees and prayed to a God I didn’t know. The only God I was familiar with was the one I grew up hearing about—a God who judged my goodness or badness. Ironically, my father was a Lutheran pastor, and I had grown up in the church. But the more I sat in church, the more I rebelled.

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Eventually, I returned to God, like the prodigal son, and went back to church. Attending a non-denominational church helped somewhat, but there was still no real transformation. I felt more guilt and shame trying to live up to the perfect Christian ideal, never feeling good enough.

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Exploring My Own Truth

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For years, I questioned the faith I was raised in and sought answers for myself. I asked, "Who is God?" "Who am I?" "What is the meaning of life?" and "Why do so many people who believe in God live in quiet desperation?"

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When I allowed myself to break away from traditional paths and explore my own spiritual journey, my life began to transform. I studied Buddhism, Taoism, Hinduism, non-duality teachings from Rupert Spira, and Christian mystics like Joel Goldsmith and Thomas Merton.

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Discovering My True Self

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Through this spiritual exploration, I eventually found my way back to the true wisdom teachings of Jesus. The veil began to lift, and I realized that what I had been seeking all these years was already within me. The Kingdom of Heaven is within me, and that realization became my ticket out of quiet desperation and into a life of divine inspiration.

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Today, I wake up every day with purpose and a sense of aliveness. My mission is to help other men escape the quiet desperation I once knew all too well.

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When I stopped seeking outside myself and started listening to the still, small Voice within, I found deep inner peace. It was a peace that transcended human understanding—a peace that only comes from knowing one’s true Self.

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Becoming the Light

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I’m grateful for every struggle because without them, I wouldn’t have the wisdom or the ability to help others. I’m not a theologian; I’m just a regular guy on a pathless journey, sharing my experience and intuitive wisdom with courageous vulnerability, so others know they’re not alone.

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If I can help just one man escape the pain of quiet desperation and find deep inner peace, it will mean one more man can become a light in the world.

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When we finally emerge from our struggles, we can simply awaken to our inner Power and walk the path with courage

​courage and grace.

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Now, it’s my time to serve—to be that light for others.

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To your inner power,

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Troy Ismir

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Founder and Creator of Inner Power Collective